Take Me To My Grave. (TRANCE)

[grave]

To be here only a few days, Grave had learn enough about this place to make his mind throb for weeks. For one, he learned that not only humans have wars, gangs and violence, but it seemed that Shifters—Shifters like himself who he had no clue how there were so many—were still very similar to the humans. It had him thinking why oh why would they separate them into this place? They still looked human, talked human, and acted human—well, most of them anyways, why did they all have to be put behind a glass? The second thing he learned was that Shifters were similar to the canines he had grown up with, especially their pack structure. Ever since he’s been here, he had made sure to keep his head low and to stay out of trouble. He wasn’t yet comfortable with his surroundings, hell, he hadn’t even been able to wrap his head around the whole situation in general. Instead, he just watched and watched everything and nothing that was happening around him.

Early that morning, he woke up as soon as light dawned upon them and was up. He wondered if his habit of getting up early in the morning to start his duties in the Mafia would go away. It seemed a lot of habits of his were fading away quicker than anyone could ever imagine. One thing that amazed him was that he hadn’t thought about escaping at all. He stumbled upon the Fulsi’s as they called themselves and had stayed though they had not forced him. In fact, he had come to them in search of that feeling of belonging somewhere. It seemed like every time he had a chance to be free, he was running back into the situation where he was tied down to one place with no chance of leaving. It was funny how that worked.

The crisp morning air chilled Grave’s spine when he stepped out of the dark, dark room he began sleeping in along with the other shifters and took a breath in. White clouds left his mouth as he breathed out and looked at the sky which was beginning to turn from a sapphire blue to a pinkish colour. He shoved his hands down his pockets and stared into space thoughtfully for a moment until a voice broke his concentration.
“Hey, kid!”
At first he didn’t even bother to look over his shoulder. After all, that wasn’t his name or a name he had even been called by. It was only when the grip of a large hand grab his shoulder had him whirling around with his hands balled into fists and his body stiffened. It must have been the look in Grave’s eyes that put the taller man off guard and had him yanking his hand away like the touch of Grave’s shirt had burned his hand. Grave’s shoulders rolled, relaxing as he watched the man take a step back with a almost apologetic look.
“You’re Grave, right?” The older man said, shifting his eyes slightly as he spoke.
Grave gave him a nod before leaning on one of his legs to look over his shoulder to see a group of people forming across from them. His brown and green gaze then flicked back onto the stranger again.
“Yeah?”
“Well, they’re calling for you “
Grave was already making a bee line towards them before the man could finish his sentence. Grave caught him muttering something under his breath but that was the least of his worries.

He nearly forgot today was the day he was being assigned his ‘teacher’. What were they training for? Grave felt like he had been trained for anything that could happen. If they insisted he was going to have a teacher, he wasn’t going to have one for very long. He felt confident that he would do fine and was also a little eager to see who would he be assigned to. If this had been the past, he would have been pacing around on all fours while his tag wagged a mile a minute. The unknown had always intrigued him, even if the unknown led to bad things.

The name ‘Trance’ was called when he approached the Head patrol man and turned to see who would come. His eyes widen while his brows curled while looking at the Shifter coming towards them. It wasn’t hard to read on Grave’s face that he was thinking hard about his new ‘Teacher’. He looked no older than Grave himself with dark eyes that Grave thought were black or brown at first but were dark like the sky was earlier today. As he sized him up, he couldn’t help but feel something was different. I know you, Grave kept saying in his head but it wasn’t true, or he didn’t think it was true.

There were so many conflicting thoughts running through Grave’s mind though none surfaced to the top. He offered Trance a polite smile and stuck out his hand which wasn’t entirely natural to him but it was something he observed his human masters do and they did the same thing here so he made sure he wouldn’t be the odd one out of the group.
“Name’s Grave, pleasure to meet you,” He said, his tone not as hollow as the meaning behind them were. Another thing he learned from his Masters was that they lied frequently to their guests face and so he was doing the same. In all honesty, he wasn’t sure if this would be a pleasure at all or not.

Grave turned his head back to look at the Leader while he gestured out orders. Grave was to be taken out on a patrol to get a basic idea of what exactly he would be doing. It had Grave wondering if they were expecting him to do this for the rest of his life or not, but he never raised a finger to ask. Instead her gave a slight shrug of his shoulders and glanced at Trance before following him in whatever direction
he led him. As they walked, Grave tried not to stare and notice Trance’s features like they would answer his question earlier about why he looked so familiar to him. It would be a while till they made it to Delica Park, so Grave killed the time with questions.

“This place—it’s really something, isn’t it?” He asked out of the blue, turning his head to meet Trances gaze. He grinned at him slightly, making the mark above his eye stretch while his features became animated with life. “Did this ever happen before the keepers closed us off in here?”
He didn’t mean to sound stupid or childish, but he didn’t know. He’d grown up only seeing the world around him through a window and when he was a little older his view on it wasn’t any different. This placed reminded him so much of his life before he came here, he wondered if this was what freedom was suppose to be like.

ooc; gah crappy first post with this charrie x—x; will make him a table one of these days >u>. Hope it’s enough to reply to!

[trance]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=width,425,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][bg=000000] Trance was under the impression that he had already had a Tenderfoot; Adley, as strange as that was, had grown on him in some way. Adley was his—someone he was supposed to protect, someone he knew (well, not really, but he knew him better than any Tenderfoot he’d be getting assigned today). However, Adam had said, some time ago, that Adley would be reassigned and Trance would get someone new. A little late, but it seemed like that was finally happening. Trance’s lips thinned; names were called off, people walked away, until finally a new one showed up. Upon seeing ‘his’ new Tenderfoot, Trance couldn’t help but feel like there was something off. Grave looked familiar, strangely; like someone he’d known a very long time ago, or out of a dream. Like a young boy who’d grown up to be someone much older, but was still the same. I don’t know him; I don’t know anyone inside the Menagerie but people I’ve met in here, and Haze, but I don’t know where he is. And this isn’t Haze. Trance paused, staring stoically towards the young man he was faced with. Grave; I’d say it was a weird name, but so is mine. And it’s not familiar, either. Maybe it’s his nickname…? Trance held Grave’s gaze for just a moment; for long enough to tell that his eyes were brown, one with a sliver of green in it. That earned another shock of recognition, but he smothered it and hesitantly shook the stranger’s hand. “I’m Trance.” I wonder what he thinks of me. Trance glanced at his boots, and then felt a flare of bitterness, remembering his first encounter with Adley; how the Tenderfoot had used him to his advantage… and how he’d done absolutely nothing to prevent it. Trance bit the inside of his lip hard enough to taste blood; would that happen again? And the question was, would Trance let it? The yes in his head was clipped and final. He was just the dog; how could he keep forgetting that? - - - - - A few minutes later they were heading towards Delica Park (it seemed he went there often), and Trance was resting in almost complete silence, walking a comfortable distance away from his new Tenderfoot; close enough that they could talk easily, but he was not within arms reach. “This place—it’s really something, isn’t it?” Trance paused for a second, not answering immediately. He didn’t know what to think of the Menagerie; he couldn’t ever really decide of it was better than the life he’d known outside of it. “Did this ever happen before the keepers closed us off in here?” “I guess you could call it that but I don’t really know exactly what kind of something.” Trance’s grin was a little bitter and wry. The scars that ran the length of the left side of his face made the gesture slightly lopsided, slightly crooked; his eyes, now slightly different colors from the blindness in his left eye, seemed amused for just a moment. Then he sobered and glanced towards the sky. “… and I don’t think so.” He shrugged, almost apologetically, before continuing on his way. He knew the way to Delica Park, he had it memorized; it was one of his favorite places to go in the Menagerie. For just a second, Trance wondered what life would have been like if the Menagerie had never been invented; for one foolish second, he wondered what his life would have been like if he had been born human instead of animal. Would he have had parents? Trance could still remember the sterilized places he was raised in, with the generic mothers that would come in and nurse him, would feed him, and would leave. And then, when he got older, the rough bowls that were shoved into his cage, full of food for an animal. He shook his head. It was better not to remember that; but then, Trance didn’t have very many happy memories. He glanced at the Tenderfoot, then, his dark eyes slightly narrowed; the one that could still see appraising Grave thoughtfully. “Where did you come from—” a pause, and then his expression became something more mild, almost apologetic. “—sorry. That was rude. I was just wondering, si—“ Trance cut himself off before he could finish the sir, blushing furiously as he gnawed on his bottom lip and looked at his feet. For some reason, Grave reminded him of long hours spent in cages, and then the following years spent in a large manor that was too open and airy, like it had been full once and was then emptied. On top of that, Grave made Trance remember what he was. A dog.

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[grave]

While they walked towards their destination, it seemed the air had thickened along with the tension so that a knife could cut it. Trance’s pace was quicker than Graves and for a moment he wondered if that had been done purposely. He kept behind his Scout, staring at the back of his head like that would give him answers. He realized there that everything had been calculated carefully on Trance’s half. He was keeping a quick pace to keep ahead of him, obviously, but Grave had a gut feeling it wasn’t only to lead him but perhaps to get away from him. If Grave had bothered to speed up his pace, it would give Trance enough time to speed up himself and avoid him. Why was he trying to keep away from him though? Grave was aware he wasn’t the scariest looking person in this place—in fact, some had described him as having a rather boyish look to him. People called him ‘kid’ when technically he was an adult and although he didn’t know much about the real world, he made up for it with his experience of abuse and neglect he endured.

Grave’s ears felt like they had twitched, but that was only a trick of his mind when he picked up the notes of resentment in Trance’s tone. Had he pushed a button he wasn’t suppose to push? It made him wonder, but he didn’t press any further. What did Grave think about this place? He thought he had been too new to really determine that—too fresh. He was still figuring out how everything worked around here and so he would do what he did best and wait until the answer came to him. Trance had said no, but there was some uncertainty in his voice when he said it which made him wonder if he was just as clueless as himself.

With a passive nod that would have never been seen by Trance, he continued moving forward. While his steps followed Trance’s the rest of him twisted around and fixed on certain things that he saw along the way. Everything was alien to Grave and made him feel slightly uncomfortable knowing he was from the place he use to reluctantly admit was home. His head lifted in question as Trance spoke to him again. He locked eyes with him as the sun’s rays gently glowed along his dirty blonde hair, almost looking like a aura around the Shifter and then there he realized his eyes were two different colours much like his own. But, he knew that they were not the same. His seemed to have changed colours from damage unlike Grave’s which had always been two different colours.

Although he hadn’t said much, Grave had already concluded that Trance was something interesting. Though Grave hadn’t shown any signs of being aggressive, Trance seemed so...meek to him. He wondered why and as he thought about it he still couldn’t help that feeling like something was familiar about Trance stirring inside of him. It bothered him that he didn’t know what was causing this feeling to burn and fester inside of him.

“Rude? ” He chuckled lightly, raising both eyebrows sarcastically. Trance seemed so hesitant and reluctant to be close to him both physically or emotionally. If he was going to be Grave’s ‘teacher’ for awhile, Grave intended on getting to know him or he would soon find himself not caring enough to learn anything from someone he couldn’t even respect. So, he finally did what he had been wanting to do and sped up till he was at Trance’s side and looked at him carefully. “Not at all. I would tell you where I’m from, but I don’t know. ”

Another flash from the past was brought up just being near him. Him saying those words had him thinking about Fargo, the fatherly figure he had in his life that explained his life story to him. Grave never imagined he would be doing the same until now. His hands slid back into his pockets and he gave a careless shrug while eyeing the ground.
“I...I was raised at some building—I don’t know what it was, but I know I was only born for one reason. ” He glanced back up at Trance again as if expecting him to jump in which again was questionable because he didn’t know anything about Trance or where he was from. Still, the clenching in his stomach continued to grow strong with every word slipping out of his mouth. “They raised me like a dog and expected me to be a human’s own personal body guard. Ha, I actually was one before I ended up here. ”

He tried to shrug and seem nonchalant, but deep inside of him he was filled with shame, fear and guilt. The other Shifters all lived lives side by side with humans while Grave lived a life of sitting by a human’s foot, waiting for their command. He didn’t want to ramble and already he felt embarrassed for mentioning something like that to someone he didn’t know. He scratched his head and glanced the other way hoping to cover that look of insecurity in his eyes before he looked at Trance again. “Is it weird to say this form is not as comfortable as my animal? That I actually enjoy walking on all fours and howling over sirens? ” That part was supposed to be more humouring than it actually was as his lips curled into a small smile. Finally he just sighed and gave a shake of his head, he had already embarrassed himself enough today to mention anything else. “It’s hard to explain. I don’t think anyone would understand me unless they had gone through what I went through. So, what about you? What’s your story? ”

ooc;another fail post *dies* I WILL GET BETTER...EVENTUALLY.

[trance]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=width,425,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][bg=000000] Some small part of him wanted to run; the more cowardly part, that is. He had no ties to this boy, no relationship with him whatsoever. They were barely beyond a name-to-name basis. But then, something stomped down that instinct; a stronger, more dominate urge; the need to protect. It was something that filled him furiously, wholly, and wasn’t completely alien to him, like the irrational fear was. He needed someone to take care of; perhaps this Tenderfoot would be it? More than Adley was, anyways, despite the fact Trance still felt responsible for him. Trance was suddenly aware of how quickly he was walking ahead of Grave. I should slow down. The thought was there, but he didn’t act on it. He just continued to worriedly bite the inside of his lip, afraid he’d say something he would regret. I wonder if he already wants a new mentor… probably. I bet he thinks I’m strange. On top of that, there was still something undeniably familiar about Grave—something that Trance couldn’t quite put his finger on, but it kept turning his mind back towards his childhood, back to dark days confined in metal, held back by chains and bars, the smell of something coopery always in the air. He remembered it sharply, bitterly; the recollection so suddenly clear that he felt taken aback—so taken aback, that when Grave spoke it shocked him. “Rude?” Trance glanced back at the man, only to discover Grave had sped up to stand beside him. Trance paused for a second, letting him catch up, and then he deliberately slowed his pace. The other shifter grinned; Trance felt his lips twitching into a similar—if smaller—expression to mirror it. It was a hesitant, uncertain gesture, but he ought to be getting used to the Tenderfoot, shouldn’t he? After all, Trance was going to be his mentor. When Grave answered, the Scout was slightly taken aback (again)—he didn’t know? The thought would have been more outraged if it wasn’t for the fact Trance could easily relate. “Wow. I’m sorry… I know how you feel, though.” He shrugged, feigning nonchalance. He wasn’t used to finding ways to relate to people. “I don’t know where I grew up either.” Trance knew he’d been raised in America, but he didn’t know where, exactly. It could have been anywhere; California, Washington, Florida, Arizona. Anywhere. And he wouldn’t ever really know where; not for certain, not for sure. He could guess, but he had little chance at getting it right. Grave continued with his story, and the farther he got into it, the more shocked Trance became. “They raised me like a dog and expected me to be a human’s own personal body guard. Ha, I actually was one before I ended up here.” He knew his eyes had widened considerably. He knew he looked surprised. Trance tried to regain his composure, and did eventually, but his lips were thinned and he was glancing at his feet, biting the inside of his lip nervously. He didn’t reply, afraid his voice would give away the desperation he felt. Someone else, who’d been raised just like him? Someone who knew what hell was like?

[/i]“Is it weird to say this form is not as comfortable as my animal? That I actually enjoy walking on all fours and howling over sirens?”[/i] “It… it isn’t weird at all. I feel the same way, most of the time. It takes some getting used to.” Trance managed to smile, just slightly, before he shifted into his sleek white shepherd dog form; it was so much more comfortable, so much easier for him. It was easy to pretend you were an animal—or was he pretending? He’d lived his life thinking that this was what he was; a dog that could turn into a human, not the other way around. He turned his face—and his good eye—back towards Grave. Trance’s expression seemed to say, Well, what are you waiting for?

“It’s hard to explain. I don’t think anyone would understand me unless they had gone through what I went through. So, what about you? What’s your story?” For one impossible moment, all Trance wanted to do was say he did understand; that, he understood perfectly. But how could he say that? He wasn’t entirely sure he was ready to accept the conditions that Grave had been raised in—the same conditions that he, himself, had been apart of. They were inhumane and clearly recognizable from the description. He’d always known that he and Haze weren’t the only dogs; he’d been put in cages with several of them throughout his lifetime. Could this be one of them? Could Grave be someone he’d known when he was that young? The idea was foreign, like a strange candy melting on his tongue.

What’s my story? Trance didn’t speak for a long time. How could you tell someone your story in just a couple of words? Sentences? He’d been alive for around nineteen years. That kind of history wasn’t something you could express in just a moment or two. On top of that, Trance didn’t know if he was ready for Grave to figure out what kind of life he had had. So he shrugged supple canine shoulders and turned his face up towards the sky, examining it through a litter of branches and leaves. “I never knew my parents; my mother, my father. I never even knew their names. I was raised for the first few years of my life in a cage, like an animal.”

Trance paused then, trying to think of how to say it. How to say it. The truth. “My story is the exact same one as yours. I was bred not born. Like I said, I was kept in a cage. When I was old enough, I was sold and treated—for just a little while—like I was human. But then the man decided to beat me down, told me I was a dog—hell, I am—and… I loved him. Is that so wrong? That I loved him? And he hated me half the time, and sometimes he treated me like a son, and sometimes he just wanted me. But all along, I was just a dog to him. I was loyal like a dog is loyal. I was brave like a dog is brave. And I loved him, like a dog loves his damn master.”

Trance’s voice had gotten very quiet. He wasn’t entirely sure where the sudden burst of words had come from; in fact, he’d been denying that he’d ever loved Brennan since he decided it was true. His single good eye remained trained on the sky—by now he had stopped walking, anyways—but he wasn’t seeing the clear blue expanse, and the glass of the Menagerie dome. No. He was seeing something else entirely; a grinning, mocking face. A flash of bloodied lips, of a sneer curling them even in death. He saw cold, cold dead eyes. And then he saw a smile like the sun, and a hand stroking its way down the side of his face, a thumb tracing his lips. He saw the pavement caked with blood. He saw it like one sees the world flashing by in a car; in fragments of blurred images, thrown together randomly and suddenly, before they were gone. He tried to hold on to them, but they slipped through his fingers. And then he was left with nothing.


ooc;; the post wasn’t supposed to get this long o.o or crazy
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[grave]

He smiled again at Trance, but this time it held less meaning. It was cold and a little resentful as well. Trance wouldn’t have been the first one to tell Grave that they ‘understood and had been through the same thing’. The thing was, or at least how Grave felt, was that no one truly understood his situation. No one had ever walked a mile in his shoes, nor had they tried. All Grave could do was nod, or so he learned, because it seemed most people got offended if he disagreed. His nod paused half way when Trance added he didn’t know where he from either.

That interested Grave and for a moment, he thought maybe Trance was right after all. Maybe he did have an understanding how Grave felt. Trance seemed taken back from what he had said, but it didn’t look like the kind of shock he would get, like they didn’t believe him, it was more like Trance knew something he didn’t. He chewed his lip and stared at the ground, looking down thoughtfully at his feet. Grave almost wanted to step out in front of him and confront Trance.

Another similarity was brought up while they walked. He tilted his head slightly at Trance and then let the smile on his face warm again. He didn’t seem that bad of a guy and in a way Grave felt a little more at ease knowing they saw some things the same way as each other. Then when he looked back to Trance he stopped in his place and glanced down seeing a dog. Out of habit, he grinned seeing another canine. Though he was usually aggressive with other dogs, he somehow felt relieved seeing another dog.

I know how you feel though...

Without a minute wasted, Grave took a few steps forward before turning into a dog himself. His dark coat was given a shake before he turned his head and barked at Trance. Now this felt right to Grave. To be on all fours, to smell and hear things with more ease—being in human form made him feel like a part of him was missing, like he was in someone else’s body. But when he was like this, it felt natural to him.

Grave padded the ground in small circles before sitting down beside the white canine. He fixed his gaze on him, but Trance’s eyes were to the sky and he could tell that his mind was far, far away from this place. Though listening to Trance was so overwhelming, not a single sound came from him until he was finished uttering his last final whisper. A sympathetic whimper came from him and he licked his lips nervously.

His head tilted slightly to one side, looking puzzled at Trance. They were far more alike than Grave could ever dream and for a moment he felt connected to him and all the emotions he could pick up from his voice.
“Brave like a dog, loyal like a dog... ” His voice drifted off. He swallowed, then continued, “Why do you make it sound like being those things is so bad? What’s wrong with being a dog? ”

Sometimes, Grave wished he wasn’t caught between man and dog. He wished he was one or the other instead of always feeling mixed inside all the time. To be just a dog would be a dream and to hear Trance mutter the name like it was a burden bothered him. It reminded him of the other shifters who he lived with before he ended up here. How they just accepted how things were and didn’t have any respect for themselves. Was Trance the same way? Did he not see himself as useful?

“It wasn’t wrong, ” He finally concluded in a long sigh. His ears flatted against his skull, sympathetic about Trance’s situation. After all, he knew how he felt exactly. “You didn’t deserve to be treated like that. Neither of us did. ”

ooc; eh not loving this post buttttttt it’s almost one now soooo thatwillbemyexcuse LOL